This is just best of what the comedy world has been tweeting about during the last week. Is it topical or relevant? Not really. Is it funny? Most certainly.

@azizansari
Confirmed: Going up to women in a bar & saying “You guys wanna hear a
dope story about kidney stones?” makes them hate you.
12:54 AM Jan 10th from web

@DougBenson
I bet Heidi Klum feels uncomfortable when she doesn’t have a baby in
her. #babyseal
Jan 14 from web

@AlYankovic
I hope I don’t wake up tomorrow morning and see #weirdal trending on
Twitter. Because that would mean I’m dead.
11:10 AM Jan 12th from web

@michaelianblack
Totally psyched to be in an exit row. If this thing goes down, I’m
charging ten bucks a head to get off the plane.
Jan 15 from web

@chrisdelia
Helping someone feels good. Helping a child feels even better. Better
than that? Saving a life. And even better than that? Sex.
9:11 PM Jan 13th from UberTwitter

@rustyrockets
Raining in La- this is not the deal. London has snow. SNOW! This
better be Hollywood rain that tastes of lemonade and gives
superpowers.
9:08 AM Jan 13th from web

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